An unexpected change that came with having children- I miss my husband, all the time-
My husband works, a laborious job- he works a lot, at least twelve hours a day. He works on the weekends sometimes- he has to travel occasionally. He does this for me, for our children- so we can maintain a healthy and stable lifestyle.
Our days consist of a few short phone calls, a bunch of “I love you” texts, a quick FaceTime, and a huge amount of picture texts courtesy of me and the boys. All of which I am entirely grateful for-
I miss him before he even leaves the house most mornings, while we are all still in bed. Then when he gets home he is smothered with love by our boys- if they aren’t already sleeping.. and if they are I am typically waiting for him on the sofa silently.
We used to lay up all night talking. Go on little cheesy dates, watch movies, go shopping, binge on sushi- we LOVE to eat. It was all so simple… so easy going- all we had to do was love each other.
Now, we spend all of our alone time typically sleeping because we are utterly exhausted, usually with a child between us.. or watching one of our favorite shows without the volume, so we don’t wake either of the boys up.. because truthfully, we are desperate to just sit in a comfortable silence together and eat warm food… You don’t think life will get this busy, and tiring when you have multiple small children. It’s something you don’t truly understand until you are in the midst of it.
Although I long for the days where we can lay in bed in the morning before all of our kids wake up and just talk for a minute before rushing for breakfast & work. Even though I am excited for the time we will have to go out to dinner without screaming toddlers. Whilst I am anxious for the day that we can go on date nights and spend time reminiscing on our beautiful life. I do not wish these current days away, I find the beauty in every single one of these days, even the hardest and the longest of them.
Our romance is no where near dead- I don’t think it could ever be dead between him and I. But, it is a different type of romance.. like saving the last cookie, keeping his dinner warm in the oven, matching his socks. He talks to me while I soak in the tub & lets me be the big spoon because he’s too heavy… he listens to me complain, and reassures me that I’m doing great.
Having children has definitely changed our relationship. We are different now. We have grown- and continue to grow everyday. We work as a team now, and try to be considerate and supportive all the time.
We take every second that we can get, just him and I- and we always remember that it won’t always be like this. We don’t dwell on the fact that we can’t get away often. We don’t typically have ‘alone time’. But, we don’t concentrate on those things.. instead we just love each other the best we can day in and day out- we love our boys with all our might, together.
Our days are busy and long. The nights seem short. But just like everything else in life, this too shall pass- and I know we will miss it like hell when it does. So for now we embrace it, complain about it, love it, and hate it. But most importantly love each other fiercely through it. Even though I do miss him, I would miss this hectiness even more if we didn’t have it ✨